Don't Panic! We don't mean real cats; we love 'em and would never do anything to hurt the real thing. However... we have just over a hundred of the most revolting ornamental cats you have ever seen - unless you know different! (If you've ever come across anything worse please send us photos!)

We hate them! We inherited them when we bought our shop, just over two years ago, and no matter how hard we try we just can't get rid of them. The previous owner of Number 81 who shall remain nameless (in case we get sued!) seemed to think that buying 130 of these was a good idea! In his infinite wisdom he put them in the shop for sale for £3.95 each - guess how many he sold?

They are designed to sit on a shelf at a jaunty little angle, looking ready to pounce, however most of them don't balance, and their eyes have been stuck in with so much glue they all look like they've got a bad dose of conjunctivitis.

So your mission... should you choose to accept it - is to help us find ways of destroying them and clearing a bit of space in our shed once and for all.

If you've got any interesting or unusual ways to get rid of these cats drop Jade an e-mail at jade@postalgifts.com and if we like your idea we will send you a cat free of charge to try it out on. All we ask in return is that you send us photographs of the deed being done, and we'll publish the pics on our website.

For instance - do you have?

A Steamroller that could crush one?
A Nuclear reactor to drop one into?
A Plane to drop it out of?
Are you going on holiday somewhere that has a large gorge, or cliffs they can be thrown from?

Use your imagination and put us out of our misery, there is a choice of colour you can have a ginger, black or Siamese style if you have any preference please let Jade know when you e-mail her.

Thanks - the Number 81 Team